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The Art of Pretentious Beer Talk: Confessions of a Craft Brew Enthusiast

Have you ever found yourself in a social setting, surrounded by fellow craft beer aficionados, and felt the need to sound knowledgeable about your favorite brews—only to realize you might be in over your head?

Last weekend, while attending a bottle share gathering, I encountered one of those moments, and it was both enlightening and amusing. When a friend opened a barrel-aged sour, I couldn’t resist the urge to express my “deep appreciation” for the way its distinctive brett interacted with the oak tannins. I even threw in some jargon about beautiful phenolic compounds. The catch? I had no clue what phenolic compounds actually were. It was as though I had mashed together terms I vaguely remembered from some brewing podcast and wine tastings I had stumbled upon.

What truly struck me was the way everyone nodded in agreement, as if I had uttered a profound truth. Encouraged by their reactions, I decided to dig deeper into my pretentious banter, adding that the beer “expresses local terroir through indigenous microflora.” In my mind, I was impressively insightful; in reality, I was crafting a cocktail of buzzwords without a solid understanding of what I was saying.

Not too long ago, I caught myself describing a beer as having “mouthfeel complexity.” What I really meant was that it had a thick texture. At that moment, I realized I had been indulging in a kind of craft beer mad lib—a playful but ultimately nonsensical concoction of words that made me sound more knowledgeable than I actually was.

Do you ever find yourself in similar situations? It’s fascinating how much we can get caught up in the lingo of craft beer culture, sometimes parrotting terms we’ve heard without fully grasping their meanings. It raises an interesting question about our shared experiences as beer lovers—are we genuinely engaging with the beer, or are we just hoping to blend in with the crowd?

Let’s embrace the spirit of craft brewing: a world full of exploration, discovery, and perhaps a little harmless pretension. After all, isn’t enjoying beer together what really matters?