The Art of Pretension: Have You Ever Said Something Ineloquent About Beer?

In the vibrant world of craft beer, eloquent descriptions often take center stage. Just last weekend at a local bottle share, I found myself in a situation that could only be described as both hilarious and cringe-worthy. As someone opened a barrel-aged sour, I felt compelled to showcase my “knowledge” and declared with absolute confidence that I “truly appreciated the characteristic brett interacting with the oak tannins to create some beautiful phenolic compounds.”

The kicker? I had no clue what phenolic compounds were—I was merely stringing together words I had encountered in wine jargon and a podcast I half-listened to months prior. What’s worse is that the crowd around me nodded in agreement as if I had just profoundly enlightened them. Feeling emboldened by their reactions, I continued with a grand assertion that the beer was “expressing local terroir through indigenous microflora.”

Reflecting on it later, I realized that I had ventured far away from reality into the realm of craft beer buzzwords. Just last month, I even found myself discussing a beer’s “mouthfeel complexity,” when, in all honesty, I simply meant it tasted thick and rich.

This raises an intriguing question: Are we, as beer enthusiasts, often caught in the act of speaking in what I can only describe as “craft beer mad libs”? Are we simply echoing phrases we’ve heard from others, just waiting for someone to validate our pretentiousness? If you’ve ever been in a similar position, you’re not alone. The pursuit of knowledge in the craft beer community can sometimes lead us to adopt an air of sophistication that doesn’t genuinely reflect our understanding.

Let’s embrace the joy of beer—whatever words we use to describe it—and remember that at the end of the day, enjoyment comes first. So, have you ever found yourself in a position where you felt the need to sound knowledgeable about beer but weren’t entirely sure what you were talking about? Share your experiences!