The Art of Pretentious Beer Talk: Confessions of a Craft Beer Enthusiast

In the world of craft beer, where flavors and aromas are dissected with both enthusiasm and precision, it can be all too easy to find ourselves caught up in pretentious jargon that often escapes our true understanding. This past weekend at a bottle share event, I had an experience that perfectly illustrated this phenomenon.

A friend opened a barrel-aged sour, and before I knew it, I was extolling the virtues of how I “truly appreciated the characteristic brett interacting with the oak tannins to create some beautiful phenolic compounds.” The reality? I couldn’t define phenolic compounds if my life depended on it. My statement was merely a jumble of wine vernacular mixed with a vague recollection from a brewing podcast I may have listened to in passing.

As fate would have it, my audience nodded in agreement as if I had just shared a profound insight. Emboldened by their responses, I decided to take it a step further, spouting out some nonsense about how the beer “expresses local terroir through indigenous microflora.” In hindsight, I realized that I was essentially playing a game of craft beer Mad Libs, stringing together phrases that sounded impressive but meant very little.

Only last month, I found myself tackling the concept of “mouthfeel complexity” in a conversation, when, in reality, I was simply trying to convey that the beer had a thick texture. It’s amusing, isn’t it? We often wind up echoing terms we’ve overheard, hoping we don’t attract scrutiny or, worse, reveal our own ignorance.

This raises an interesting question: Are we all guilty of pretending to understand more about beer than we actually do? How many of us have fumbled through a discussion, using highbrow language to mask our uncertainty? If you can relate, you’re certainly not alone. Let’s embrace the delicious complexity of craft beer while remembering that sometimes, simplicity is key. After all, at the end of the day, it’s about enjoying the beer, not impressing the crowd. Cheers!