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Steven Coulson
Steven has been drinking beers, wines and spirits for decades and has a propensity to go about them at length after a few drinks.
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The Pretentious Paradox: Talking Beer Without Understanding
Last weekend, I attended an intriguing bottle share event where the air was filled with the rich aromas of various craft beers. It was an exciting atmosphere, with enthusiasts gathered to explore unique brews. However, amidst the clinking of bottles and animated discussions, I found myself in a rather embarrassing situation.
When someone unveiled a barrel-aged sour, I felt compelled to join the conversation. With a sense of confidence that I later regretted, I declared my admiration for how the “characteristic brett interacts with the oak tannins to create some beautiful phenolic compounds.” The reality? I was completely lost when it came to the term “phenolic compounds.” It felt like I was filtering through a jumble of vineyard vocabulary and snippets from a brewing podcast I’d listened to previously.
To my surprise, the group nodded in agreement as if I had shared a profound insight. Bolstered by their reaction, I delved deeper, adding something about the beer’s ability to “express local terroir through indigenous microflora.” I wanted to impress, but instead, I was just stringing together phrases that sounded impressive but meant nothing to me.
This isn’t an isolated incident, either. Just last month, I found myself talking about a beer’s “mouthfeel complexity,” when what I really meant was that it had a thick texture. It struck me then how we often slip into the rhythm of discussing craft beer using jargon that we’ve heard before—hoping to convey depth without fully grasping the meaning.
I can’t help but wonder if I’m alone in this experience. Are we all, at times, just playing craft beer mad libs? It often feels like a game where we echo what others say, hoping to be seen as knowledgeable without the fear of being called out. How often do we find ourselves wrapped up in pretentious banter about our favorite brews, despite our limited understanding of the terms we use?
I invite fellow enthusiasts to share their experiences. Have you ever caught yourself talking about beer in a way that sounded sophisticated but left you wondering what you really meant? Let’s explore this whimsical side of the craft beer culture together.