The Art of Pretentious Beer Talk: Confessions from a Rookie Beer Enthusiast

Have you ever found yourself in a brewery or a craft beer tasting event, confidently spouting terms and phrases that make you sound like an expert—only to realize you have no clue what you’re talking about? It’s a common scenario among those of us who enjoy the occasional craft brew but might not have the deep knowledge that some aficionados possess.

Recently, I attended a bottle share event where the experience quickly turned amusingly surreal. When someone opened a barrel-aged sour, I found myself enthusiastically declaring how I “truly appreciated the characteristic brett interacting with the oak tannins to create some beautiful phenolic compounds.” In that moment, I was blissfully unaware of what phenolic compounds even were; I was merely cobbling together bits of wine jargon and vague memories from a brewing podcast.

To my surprise, my audience nodded in agreement as if I had uttered some timeless wisdom. This only emboldened me to elaborate further, stating that the beer “expressed local terroir through indigenous microflora.” While it sounded impressive, all I really meant was that it had a unique flavor profile, and I felt a little more than fraudulent.

I’ve also caught myself tossing around phrases like “mouthfeel complexity,” when my intention was merely to describe a beer that tasted thick. It felt ridiculous, as if I was engaging in a game of craft beer mad libs, throwing out advanced terminology without truly grasping its meaning.

This experience left me wondering: is this a widespread phenomenon? Are we, as beer enthusiasts, simply echoing the lingo we hear from others, hoping no one will see through our charade? I can’t be the only one who feels this way. It’s an odd dynamic in the craft beer world, where jargon can sometimes overshadow the simple joy of enjoying a good brew.

So here’s a thought: let’s embrace our inner novice. There is no shame in admitting that we’re still learning—after all, the world of craft beer is vast and complex. Whether you’re a seasoned expert or just starting your journey, let’s appreciate the flavors and experiences that each unique brew offers, rather than getting too lost in sophisticated terminology. Cheers to honesty in beer appreciation!