The Art of Pretentious Beer Talk: Confessions of a Craft Beer Enthusiast

At a recent bottle share event, I found myself caught up in a moment of pretentiousness that many beer lovers might relate to. As a bottle of barrel-aged sour was passed around, I felt the urge to impress those around me. So, without fully grasping the terminology, I blurted out my admiration for how the “characteristic brett interacted with the oak tannins to create some beautiful phenolic compounds.”

Truth be told, I had no idea what phenolic compounds were. It seems I had mashed together some wine jargon from a conversation I overheard and a fragment of knowledge from a brewing podcast. However, to my surprise, everyone around me nodded along with admiration, as if I had just unveiled a secret truth about the universe.

Feeling emboldened, I proceeded to elaborate, claiming that the beer was “expressing local terroir through indigenous microflora.” In that moment, I briefly pondered my own absurdity—was I participating in legitimate discussion, or merely playing a role in a craft beer charade?

Reflecting on the evening, I recalled another instance where I excitedly described a beer’s “mouthfeel complexity,” when what I genuinely meant was that it had a thick texture. It hit me: we often navigate the world of craft beer with a vocabulary that can border on nonsensical.

Are we not all, at times, engaging in a sort of craft beer Mad Libs? As enthusiasts, we sometimes regurgitate phrases we’ve encountered, hoping that our peers won’t see through our facade. I can’t help but wonder—do others feel the same pressure to sound knowledgeable?

In the world of craft beer, it might be time to embrace our unfiltered honesty and simply enjoy the brew. After all, isn’t the joy of drinking beer meant to be savored, not dissected into pretentious fragments? Let’s raise a glass to authenticity, cheers to appreciating beer for what it is, and perhaps, cutting back on the wine-esque terminology!