The Art of Pretentious Beer Talk: Confessions from a Beer Enthusiast

Ah, the world of craft beer—a realm filled with enthusiasts who revel in the complex notes and intricate layers of various brews. However, amidst the rich aromas and bold flavors lies a phenomenon that some of us might not fully grasp: the pretentious jargon often associated with beer tasting. Recently, I found myself swirling a glass of barrel-aged sour at a local bottle share and suddenly felt compelled to impress my fellow connoisseurs.

With an air of confidence, I proclaimed my admiration for how the brett harmonized with the oak tannins, leading to the formation of some “beautiful phenolic compounds.” Confession time: I have no concrete idea what those phenolic compounds are! It seems I merely stitched together wine terminology and snippets of knowledge gleaned from a brewing podcast I half-listened to.

To my complete astonishment, everyone bobbed their heads as if I had just shared a groundbreaking revelation. Encouraged by their nods, I decided to elevate my pretentiousness and added a comment about the beer “expressing local terroir through indigenous microflora.”

Looking back, I realized just how far off the mark I had gone. Last month, I had even ventured to describe a beer’s “mouthfeel complexity,” when I really meant to say it was thick. Let’s be honest: I was trading clarity for eloquence, falling into a pattern that resembles what I can only describe as craft beer mad libs.

It seems that many of us in the beer community have fallen into this trap. Often, we find ourselves regurgitating phrases we’ve overheard, hoping no one questions our understanding. So I ask you: have you ever found yourself in a similar situation?

As we navigate this rich tapestry of craft beer, perhaps it’s time we focus more on genuine appreciation rather than lofty descriptions. After all, at the end of the day, isn’t enjoying a good beer what it’s truly all about?